Pinoy Twilight: "Takipsilim"

According to the ever reliable Perez Hilton, ABS-CBN recently bought the rights of "Twilight" (now confirmed! See this.) and is fast-tracking production, since, you know, they want to beat the Richard-KC movie to the punch come Valentine's Day.

(Before you get confused if you're even reading the same blog, yes this is the same blog, and since its Christmas, it's the season for bashing so lets carry on!)

It reportedly stars Rayver Cruz as Edward Cullen, and Vina Morales' sis (her name is too hard to spell) as Bella Swan. The blogosphere is rife with opposition even to the idea of such being thought of, and it was only a matter of time before we see Makisig Morales as Harry Potter, and Sarah Geromino as Narnia's Princess Susan.

But before you even yap about the Filipino movie industry's lack of originality, have you ever thought that Hollywood is also losing ideas ever since they made James Bond a movie star? Bond, Mickey Mouse, Superman, Jamie Sullivan & Landon Carter, The Lord of the Rings, heck, even Die Hard 4.0 and Dancing with the Stars were all adaptations of prior works. Heck, even the Oscars gives an award for unoriginality.

But what makes this more appalling, is not on the perceived inability of the leads to even resemble how Kristen Stewart's face twitches everytime she speaks, or Robert Pattinson's character's supposedly hairless chest (on which I will get into later), but on how the local movie industry has ignored the local publishing industry on the gems that exist right in the sidewalks of Espana Boulevard -- yes, those dirty and little Tagalog pocketbooks! Why won't they make movie versions of those? Everyone wants to see Vhong Navarro as Tong in Bob Ong's "Ang Alamat ng Gubat", with a cameo from Marian Rivera as the cute mermaid.

So to remedy this, is to ditch Rayver and Shaina, and replace them with the hallmarks of contemporary Filipino acting:

• Sam Milby as Maria Isabela Suyat
• Piolo Pascual as Eduardo Culala
• Pokwang as Jacob del Negro
• Chokoleit as Rosario Halili

Set in the rainy town of Gigmoto, Catanduanes, and Edward's shiny Volvo will become his shiny FX taxi. And 6cyclemind will sing the theme song. I still have to figure out what is the Tagalog for "Decode", though.

Jose Nepomuceno would have never thought Filipino cinema would have achieved this much 90 years after he made "Dalagang Bukid". He should be very proud.