Top 10 annoyances of... lefties

Left-handed people comprise about 10% of the population, but never has been a minority so oppressed by the majority, even Adolf Hitler will look like a baby.

I'm left-handed, but there's one stark difference: I was trained to write with the right hand. Like how the heck can a person writing with his right (oooh, "write" is synonymous with "right!" It's a travesty!) hand be called left-handed? Well, I do all of my other stuff primarily with the left hand, like eating, and, what are the other stuff you do with only one hand? I know of one, but I'd rather not say it here. Boys would know that, though.

What's even made it worse for me is that I have a lazy eye, and the lazy eye is the left eye. So I'm a person who is left-handed but writes with the right hand who primarily sees the world through his right eye.

10. Left-handed people are evil.
Ever noticed that many words pertaining to "left" are inherently bad? Like, "sinister" is Latin for "left" but if you're "sinister," you are bad. If someone leaves you, you are "left" with no one. If there are two of you, your companion is "right" beside you, even though the person may be situated on your left. We are often told to fight for our human "rights" but there are no human "lefts". If you have "two left feet" you're a bad dancer.

Ambidextrous people are efficient on both hands. Guess what is the Latin word for "right"? (Clue: It's that kid who has a laboratory.) And what's the opposite of ambidextrous? Ambisinistrous.

9. You can't play polo
Like as if I can play the sport where people ride horses, then they hit a ball with a long hammer. If you're left-handed, playing polo with the rest of the field right-handed is dangerous. Imagine yourself being trampled by horses!

8. Right-hand drive
Hey at least, the steering wheel is on the left. At least the Brits, and most recently Samoans drive on the left side of the road.

Pinoys drove on the left until 1945's Battle of Manila when Americans got all confused and ordered all traffic should be on the right.

7. Camera freak? Where's the shutter button?
Yes, on the right. Ah, this is the fault of mass production, since all manufactured goods should be created primarily for right-handed people, producing goods for left-handed people may produce a dent on profits. Getting specifically left-handed goods is either impossible, costs higher or they have to be custom made.

6. Even mice hate you.
Well, since I write with my right hand, using a computer mouse on the right side seems pretty easy. At least it's easier to implement mouse to work on the left side, since software can make you do it, and the mouse buttons have the same size. You're screwed if the table your computer is resting is suited for mice on the right side.

5. Wanna be like Prince? By "Prince" I mean the artist formerly known as Prince.
Guess what, there's a dearth of left-handed guitarists out there. Sure you can make your guitar left-handed by removing all the strings, then re-arranging them in reverse but who does that? Or you can strum in reverse.

4. Wanna cut something up?
If you're left-handed, using a pair of scissors will be a mighty pain in the ass. That's why I aced my home economics classes; my mom would do those projects at home. LOL. If you're an engineering student, life must be hell.

3. There are no left-handed fictional characters
Well sure, there might be, and you'd probably be a fan boy if you notice it, but there has to be a fictional character who is left-handed whom you can easily spot.

For one, Timmy Turner in The Fairly OddParents pitches left. And hey, one of those vampires in Twilight is left-handed too. Don't ask me how I knew those.

2. The spoon and fork are reversed.
When you go to a high-class restaurant, you'd see the spoon and fork (or the fork and spoon) on the right side of the table, with the fork on the left side of the spoon. Everywhere in that restaurant, all of them are arranged that way. Like come on, I'm not asking for restaurants to ask their customers at the entrance what hand they use most often, but they can probably reserve two tables at least in which at least one plate has the fork situated to the right of the spoon.

1. The "beak" of the dipper is situated on the "wrong" side
If you have those dippers (or in Tagalog, tabo) that has a "beak" on one side (think of it as a pitcher, only that you'll use it in a bathroom), if you hold it with the right hand, the water will naturally flow towards the beak. Now if you're left handed, the water flows to the opposite side.

Now that there is virtually no difference on which side of the dipper you'd use, but when I see water going to the "wrong" side, it feels as if I'm doing a mundane task such as pouring water into the toilet bowl wrongly, but there isn't really no right or wrong way to do it. It just sucks. Or pours.