Spotted! Gossip Girl is at the West Coast!

...and her name is Silver! But don't call her Erin or else the only response you'd get from her "would be silence and a death stare."

So you know you're old when you at least saw an episode Beverly Hills, 90210 on its original run. Luckily for me, I was too jologs young to watch the original Beverly Hills.

But I would admit I saw Jennie Garth from What I Like About You (you know, that sitcom with Amanda Bynes), so I can say with absolutely certainty that I'm a total outsider when it comes to L.A.'s northern suburb. Feel free to ask me about LA's southern suburb, the place where the Angels and the Ducks play.

So apparently, Kansas dad (why is it always in Kansas? Why not Nebraska, hell why not Idaho?), had a cute kid, followed the initiative of Sandy Cohen and adopted a kid. So, Kansas dad somewhat gets the job of school principal at West Beverly Hills High School, and he tags along the entire family to a road trip not seen since Beavis and Butthead Do America, all the while we see the prettiness of Los Angeles hearing "Viva la Vida." Yes, that overly cold song from Coldplay. Like I love this song, but when you're moving your entire family from the Great Plains to the big city, you'd listen to something happier. Something in the vein of "Young Folks."

Wanna know why Gossip Girl's grandma CeCe got de-devilized? Her awesomeness was sucked in by Grandma Tabitha. Grandma welcomes daddy, granddaughter, adoptive grandson, and naturally, not mommy. Bro and sis bond at the pool, with sis wearing a two-piece bikini (and she didn't even took a swim). Heck, even GG made us wait to see Blair and Serena on the pool for twelve episodes, 90210 made us wait for 3 minutes. Finally, we're off to see the credits for the first time. They rehashed the original 90210 theme but they made sure the rehasher was into emo music.

So siblings Annie and Dixon goes to school for the first time. Annie sees her old "friend" having sex the unconventional way (in broad daylight, no less!), Dixon makes it to the lacrosse team, Annie becomes friends with the Blair wannabe, Annie gets in the school musical (Gabriella Montez would be very proud), Annie and Blair wannabe gets busted for plagiarism, Dixon gets busted for being a Dan wannabe (for sucker punching the Chuck wannabe), and bro and sis gossip while in bed. If I were Dixon, I'd would have d... never mind. This is a GP blog! When I feel like it.

Meanwhile, Annie meets Silver, aka the awesomest teen character in the West Coast since Taylor Townsend. Apparently, Silver and Blair wannabe (ok, she's Naomi) are like what emo peeps and being happy. So when Annie goes with Naomi, Silver (don't call her Erin) Gossip Girls herself. Of course, Annie is not appreciative of what happened so Erin Silver makes it up for tagging Annie up for the school musical. Of course, Annie is now appreciative but Dixon of course make life complicated for poor little anorexic Annie. To have some payback against the-dude who-did-sex-the-unconventional-way-who-screwed-him-with-the-higher-ups-that-caused-him-to-be-kicked-out-of-the-lacrosse-team (one less opponent for Nate Archibald), he texted Naomi what Annie told him while bonding in bed. Too bad, Naomi's purse went missing. Or was it?

Naomi is celebrating her 16th birthday! OMFG! Can you believe that? She's 16?! What? STFU! Are you drugs? GTFO! Did she find the fountain of ageing? LMAO! <insert witty net acronym here>?!?!?! And what better way to screw everything up on your birthday, right Blair Waldorf?

So someone returns Naomi's purse, all the while Annie and Erin Silver thought she didn't receive the message. So while the-dude who-did-sex-the-unconventional-way and Naomi danced centerstage (hey at least he's better than Archibald since he actually had the balls to show up), Naomi asked him if he did sex-the-unconventional-way. In true Chuck Bass fashion, he kept quiet.

And oh, I totally forgot about the old people. Annie's dad and Naomi's mom (so Lily and Rufus! Ha!) knocked each other up. And Naomi's mom gave their son up for adoption, all the while Annie's dad knew nothing.

So there ends the first hour. It's actually a two-hour series premier. If you won't be watching/downloading anything on Tuesdays, wanna see overly skinny girls in sunny California, and more sex-the-unconventional-way, I highly recommend this show to you, dear reader. Otherwise, just read the original gossip blog from the East Coast.