The Hopia kids are back in the finals since 2001, and are looking for their first title since the year Ariel Vanguardia was born. You know two years ago, pundits were highlighting the fact that the players weren't even born when San Beda last won their title, this time, it's better to use the coach to illustrate the fact how JRU has been unlucky, or pathetic however you look at it.
10. Ariel Vanguardia hates Frankie Lim's guts as emo people love being happy.
9. Njei will prove once and for all that Cameroonians are better than Nigerians.
8. The Province of Rizal will annex Mandaluyong City so that JRU will be at Rizal again.
7. Rustan's will be flooded by people who don't usually shop there if JRU wins.
6. Eng Bee Tin will buy off what's left off Ma Mon Luk's chain of stores.
5. Because Jay-R Taganas would be too full from eating too many hopia.
4. Flour prices will drop if JRU wins.
3. Pong Escobal will sub for Chris Tiu in Pinoy Records while Tiu stalks Pacquiao all around America.
2. Ogie Menor's haircut wasn't approved by San Beda's security guards.
1. WWE fans will chant "Let's go Sena!" when James Sena FUs Sam Ekwe like hell.